I don’t know how to open up. Well, to the person I need to anyway. I can’t put my feelings into words. It’s killing me cause I need to let it out… as soon as possible.
Sometimes I need to be self reminded that I’m not the only one in this kind of situation. And I always have to be strong and be prepared for what’s to come.
Time and effort.
I remember the day the day I was leaving for Philippines. We met up for coffee right after your work. It was only for a short period of time but I appreciated it. The fact that you were tired from work, had to wait for me for like 30mins and how you were supposed to play basketball right after. Well, you still played but later.
I love how when I’m about to go out of town/country or you can’t make it to Saturday Nights, there’s always a way for us to see each other that week or just before I leave.
This time, I’m leaving to Dunedin tomorrow night for the weekend. I was supposed to go to your house earlier tonight but I got freaking lazy cause it was way too cold outside. Yeah, you only live 2mins away from me, but shit it was cold.
Then your cousin txts me saying that they’re picking me up for coffee. I knew you weren’t coming so I had to find a way to see you before I leave tomorrow. So, after having coffee, I went with your cousin to your house and dropped off some brownies (but sadly you were already asleep). Luckily, I thought of bringing some brownies over cause as soon as I got in the car earlier, your cousin said that you wanted some brownies :)
Well, it sucks how I don’t get to see you before I leave (even though it was my fault).. but that’s okay. I’ll just see you when I get back :)
First half of 2013.
I’ve kept all my thoughts and feelings to myself for a very long time, now it’s starting to pour out…
I used to blog about my every sadness, every drama, every happiness I felt.. but for some unknown reason, I stopped. I got used to keeping it between myself and I for almost a year. But now I think it’s getting too much and I need to let it out. Or maybe I just don’t have any one to talk to? Or I just simply don’t know who to talk to about them.
In the past year, I can say that I think I finally know who my true friends are. The ones who would stick by me no matter what. The ones who would make me feel like I wasn’t gone for 4-5 months. The ones who would update me on everything once I got back. The ones who not once made me feel like I missed out on anything. I may have lost a bunch of friends but I definitely gained a new set.
Dramas are inevitable. They’re every where. From a simple “tampuhan” of friends to those love life dramas. It’s only been 6 months into the year and I’ve already had few of them. I not once expected to have any dramas this year. But then again, like I said dramas are inevitable. Serendipity, that’s all I gotta say. All thanks to one person, I am where I am right now and I couldn’t be any happier. Despite the shitty feeling I am having, I’m still thankful.
So, thank you.
Those little things.
I remember Valentines Day/Night where I was tryna vomit my life out but nothing would come out of my mouth. You were by my side tryna calm me down cause I was honestly about to shove my hand down my throat plus I was also crying. Lol.
It seems like the only people I can talk about my current situation are his cousins and boys.. But that’s something I don’t see as an option. Why? Because there’s a high chance that they would be bias.